27.4.16

Her ayrıntım sayıklıyor

I like to think (and
the sooner the better!)
of a cybernetic meadow
where mammals and computers
live together in mutually
programming harmony
like pure water
touching clear sky. 

I like to think
(right now, please!)
of a cybernetic forest
filled with pines and electronics
where deer stroll peacefully
past computers
as if they were flowers
with spinning blossoms. 

I like to think
(it has to be!)
of a cybernetic ecology
where we are free of our labors
and joined back to nature,
returned to our mammal
brothers and sisters,
and all watched over
by machines of loving grace.

26.4.16

Başım zindan yokluk var, bu kaçıncı şikayetim bilmem

It is a restless moment. She has kept her head lowered... to give him a chance to come closer. But he could not, for lack of courage. She turns and walks away.

11.10.15

hiç biri dostumuz değil

Dünyanın son günü/İstanbul/beyaz güzel evler/ köşkler/ bütün sokaklar denize iniyor/ deniz kenarındayım/ hava güzel/ kumsal/ yaşlı bir kadınla birlikte ufka bakıyoruz/bana yalnızlıkla ilgili birşey söylüyor/hava birden kararıyor / bulutlar/Kahverengi kızıl bir at ve aynı kızıldan bıyıklı rus terbiyecisi geliyor kumsala/dalgalar büyüyor/deniz kurşuni/atın sahibi ata dalgalarla birlikte takla attırıyor/onları izliyorum/Gökyüzünden uçaklar geçmeye başlıyor/kamikazeler/giderek alçaktan uçmaya başlıyorlar/ ardlarından ışıltılı bir kül yağıyor/ korkarak yukarı koşmaya başlıyor/bir nevi savaş çıkmış/yere inerlerken robota dönüşüyorlar ve beyazlarla diğer renkliler yeryüzünde çatışmaya başlıyorlar/ beni görmemelerini umuyorum/saklanmaya kaçmaya çalışıyorum/bir beyaz robot beni görüyor/hiç biri dostumuz değil/insan suretine bürünerek (barbara streisand) peşimden gelmeye başlıyor/koşmaya başlıyorum.

16.9.15

olsaydı ile bulsaydı

" I need to stop being in love with the ideas of what could have been. We could have slowly inched closer and held each other a little tighter. We could have laughed a little harder and fallen in love some more. There are so many things that could have happened, but didn’t. We almost were. We almost weren’t. We almost happened. Cupid almost won. But he didn’t. And we didn’t either."

6.9.15

As little as you want to write when you're happy that's how much you have to write when you're miserable.

-You're really thrown by all this, aren't you?
-I, uh, yes. Uh-huh.
-I must say that in my culture, it's not judged so harshly.
-Okay, but we're not in your culture. We're in my culture and in my culture... if we didn't have things to judge harshly... we wouldn't know what to do all day.
-Well, maybe your culture needs to grow. Maybe there are other ways to look at life. Maybe there are some people you marry... and people you love.
-Arielle, you're older than I am, you're wiser I'm sure... and you've seen much more of the world. And you're beautiful, and elegant... and smart, and funny ... and interesting... and you feel like family, which is wonderful.
-Are you seriously telling me that a but is coming at the end of the sentence?
-Yes, but...being with you... would be...an affair... and to me ...not ethical. Unethical. Not good...ethically.
-I must respect your ethics if I ask you to respect mine. Should you change your mind, I will continue to be out there... smoking nook on Fridays. But if I never see you again... do know that...I will always remember you very fondly.
-Are you okay?
-I'm sad. It was the beginning.
-Of what?
-Belief.

The following Friday right about after lunchtime the pace of work began to slow. I knew where she was and it was all I could think about.

By the Friday after that.. Well, look, French girls just aren't good for your work habits. And it killed me... that she was lighting her own cigarette.

By the Friday after that..



24.5.15

internal combustion

Here, we have her mind. Structured gel. I had to get away from circuitry. I needed something that could arrange and rearrange on a molecular level, but keep its form when required. Holding for memories. Shifting for thoughts.

This is your hardware?

Wetware.

And the, uh... software?

Well, I'm sure you can guess.

Blue Book.

Here's the weird thing about search engines. It was like striking oil in a world that hadn't invented internal combustion. Too much raw material. Nobody knew what to do with it. You see, my competitors, they were fixated on sucking it up and monetising via shopping and social media. They thought that search engines were a map of what people were thinking. But actually they were a map of how people were thinking.

Impulse.

Response.

Fluid.

Imperfect.

Patterned.

Chaotic.